I just want to run but where?

I get panic attacks out of the blue sometimes for a reason & sometimes not. I just start feeling like I can't breathe and like I need to go away. Far away from my home home, my neighborhood, my family, my life. Then I just start crying because if he were here I would not be feeling like this. I accomplished nothing today and that makes me feel even worse. Is this how the rest of my life will be like?