I hurt

I sit here today, as the kids play outside, on a beautiful summer day, crying. I look at his picture and I just can't breathe. I miss him so much my chest hurts. My stomach hurts. My face hurts. I need him. I need him so much. Just to be sitting in another room. I don't care. Even if he is out in the garage. Just to be here, breathing with me. I can't do this for another 5, 10 or 40 years without him. I don't want to. Am I supposed to never look at his pictures? I have to. I need to. Oh this is the worst pain I have ever felt. I miss you Ted. Please come home to me.